A classic text on human development is Erik Erikson’s Stages of Psychological Development . Erikson’s theory focuses on the resolution of conflicts at each of the eight stages in order to move successfully on to the next stage. A much simpler treatment is found in Thomas Armstrong’s The Human Odyssey: Navigating the twelve Stages of Life. Armstrong lays out each stage with the age range and characteristics: Stage One is Prebirth characterized by Potential, Stage 2 Birth: Hope, and 3. Infancy (0-3); Vitality, 4. Early childhood (3-6); Playfulness, 5. Middle Childhood (6-8); Imagination, 6. Late Childhood (9-11): Ingenuity, 7 Adolescence (12-20: Passion, 8 Early Adulthood (20-35); Enterprise, 9. Middle Life (35-50):, Contemplation, 10 Mature Adulthood (50-80); Benevolence, 11. Late Adulthood (80+): Wisdom, 12 Death and Dying. Erikson’s analysis is more profound, but Armstrong’s stages are more easily available for most people. What I find interesting is how the various models help us think about what is happening in the stages of our own development and in the development of our children and grandchildren. Since I am now in Armstrong’s Mature Adulthood, I am conscious that my life tasks are now different than they were at earlier stages. I am fast approaching Late Adulthood where the tasks again change. As Armstrong indicates each stage has gifts to bring to life. However, it is important to realize that the concerns for people at other stages than the one I am at. Many see things from a very different viewpoint than mine. If we are truly going to bear each others’ burdens we will need to recognize the stages of life for those around us. Loving people always means seeing them where they are and responding appropriately to their situation. All the stages are good gifts and we need them all to be a whole people..
07/11/2021
Last week I wrote that I love my country, but I am conscious that people in other places love their country as well. The hymn, This Is My song, O God of All the Nations contains the line “But other hearts in other lands are beating with hopes and dreams as true and high as mine…O hear my song, Thou God of all the nations, a song of peace for their land and for mine.” I think there is nothing inconsistent with loving one’s own country and at the same time wishing the best for other countries and peoples. I think it is quite natural to feel attachment to the place of our birth. We have memories which we esteem in our lives about the place where we live. In the ancient world the land where one lived was a part of identity for the people. That sense of place and identity lives on in us even today. The question where are you from? Is a normal part of beginning acquaintanceship. Place often shapes our early identity and can continue as an influence all of our lives. People can deeply love their country even when they disagree with the policies of their government. So I honor those who identify with their own country and wish it to achieve its highest ideals. God is a God of all then nations. His love visits every place and every people. Nations that care about justice and human rights may be more in tune with God’s purposes, but his love and grace reaches out to all. Can we try to view other nations and people a bit more like God views them? Perhaps that could be a step to reducing conflict among the nations. Let there be peace on earth!
07/04/2021
Patriotism is an interesting concept. At heart I think it is a love for country and place, but that love can be expressed in many different ways. At times, it can seem like criticism when as a nation we fail to live up to our highest ideals. At times, it can be an emotional response to shared symbols and memories. It may be fierce or calm. It may delight to parade its enthusiasm or alternately be a simple quiet confidence. What I don’t think works is to accuse others of lack of patriotism when their expression of patriotism does not match our own. It is possible for a form of patriotism to be violent and destructive. It can be exclusive, shutting people out who are not like us. It can, at times, even be used as a tool to manipulate people toward false values. It is not suitable as the supreme love in life. Love for God and love for neighbor must always out weigh love for country. It is comfortable when it is possible for love of God and love for country to exist together. I believe that general free democratic societies have a better chance of that than do repressive autocratic societies. Even knowing that the United States is far from perfect, I am happy to root for US Olympic athletes, barbeque on July Fourth, Sing America, the Beautiful and delight in many other things typically American. With all her aspirations, trials and laws and triumphs, I love my country and am glad to be a part of her life. So I guess you could say I’m patriotic even if I don’t fill my yard with American flags. Maybe it is more a matter of one’s heart than any specific single action.
06/27/2021
“Survival of the fittest” was a scientific point of view and used to explain the changes that come to species as they adapt to changing conditions and environments. It was also used to explain how human beings survived. An alternate proposal for human survival was that it was cooperation rather than competition which provided the human survival advantage. I have no ability to sort out the scientific issues in these two points of view, but I confess that I am attracted to the notion that it might be cooperation rather than competition. It fits my point of view about what works best in most human situations. I can see value in completion for developing individual strength and skill but I like the results of team work. In athletics it is fascinating to watch the individual achievements of star athletes, but I am even more fascinated by how teams work together to achieve greatness. Slam dunks in basketball are impressive but team defense and well run offensive plays are really significant. They are not as obvious or exciting for the casual viewer, but for the true fan, it is where the game is won or lost. In the church we can enjoy individual gifts and accomplishments, but it is what we do together which is where our true greatness is found. In our slogan: Peacefully, simply, together, “together” is the final word, but it can be the point where the other two are most easily experienced. A gospel song puts it this way, “Together we go to make disciples for Jesus, our Lord in every land. We‘re winning the lost for Christ the Savior in far away lands and near at hand. Together we go to tell our neighbors the message of Christ, mankind’s truest friend…” We are in this journey of faith together.
06/20/2021
One of the catch phrases for the Church of the Brethren is: “Peacefully, simply, together.” We use those in our advertising and mission statement, and I value each of them. Exploring what each means individually is valuable. The middle term, “simply” has had an interesting history. At times it was reduced to what a Brethren could wear, or do you wear ties or jewelry? It can even be reduced to how expensive your taste in housing or transportation is. At its best it meant living a life style that valued the ordinary and simple things of our life. It was living with appreciation for all of God’s gifts to us and using them responsibly. It was aimed at reducing our self - indulgence and selfishness while still appreciating all that we have been given. It has the spirit of sacrifice without self -martyrdom. It eschews self - aggrandizement and values humility. It finds joy in simple pleasures and abhors self- promotion. It values others above oneself but does not denigrate our own value. It promotes servanthood but rejects forced slavery. It honors simple service and does not expect adulation or reward. It is modest in appearance and behavior without self - righteousness. It values people over things and relationship over opinion. It is aware of its own failures and limitations. To practice simplicity well really requires the grace and power of God to be a work in us. “It’s a gift to be simple. It’s a gift to be free.”
06/13/2021
My two Florida grandsons disagree about dessert. One likes cake and the other likes pie. I sometimes suspect that one likes pie because the other likes cake and vice versa. I notice that neither complain about cookies. You might prefer a certain kind but what’s not to like about a good cookie. The list of cookies I don’t like is very short compared to the volume of those I do like. I recently checked out a cookbook of 100 cookies many of which I had enjoyed, but some of my favorites were missing. There is something wonderful about a chocolate chip cookie whether with a cold glass of milk or a cup of coffee. A cashew cookie with burnt sugar icing and a cup of Scottish Afternoon Tea is equally thrilling. We still have dozens of cookie cutters from times when we decorated Christmas sugar cookies with grandchildren. The memories of laughter, fun and creativity still warm our hearts. Some cookies were equal parts cookie and frosting. Some had so many sprinkles that they were harder to eat than a taco, even the broken bits got frosted. How could something as small and ephemeral hold such memories. At times eating a cookie from my Mom Marie’s recipe, I feel like I am tasting the memory as much as tasting the cookie. Wouldn’t it be neat if the heavenly manna turned out to be cookies? Blessing may come in large sizes but sometimes blessings can be found in a tiny frosted Christmas cookie.
06/06/2021
On of the essential elements in humor is the recognition of something out of place. This can be a word out of place like a pun. One late night on a family trip we looked in vain for an open motel room. Confident that the Holiday Inn usually had space, we were frustrated by being turned away even though the “No vacancy” sign was not out. Our elementary school daughter intoned “They should have named it “Holiday Out.” Garrison Keelor made a career in humor by exaggerating the discontinuities of life in Lake Woebegone where “All the women are strong, all the men are good looking and all the children are above average”. Even slapstick comedy, a favorite of British humor capitalizes on silly behavior by seeming adults. At times the “out of place” can be more subtle. Like Lionel in As Time Goes By claiming that his hearing problems were the result of the women in his family having “unusually soft voices.” Often we do not realize the incongruity of ordinary situations until a comedian’s monologue draws our attention to them. The ability to see the ridiculous in our own attitudes and behaviors can be appropriately humbling. It is a great gift to be able to laugh at ourselves and not just to laugh at the ridiculous in others. Humor serves great purpose in our lives. I have noted the number of times when someone is interviewed about their spouse or significant other and the response to “I like/love him/her because they make me laugh. Laughter is like medicine for the soul especially when it is laced with affection and kindness. “Papa,” beg the children, “tell us again how the jello got flung across the garage.” They laughed the first time hearing the story and laughed rehearing it again. May humor, laughter and joy fill your hearts.
05/30/2021
My wife is fond of quoting the adage, “Everyman has a plan that will not work!” Occasionally, I protest, “Every woman also,” but my heart is not in the protest. I do observe that my plans often do not work out at all the way I planned. Recently, I have been doing a lot more cooking of the evening meals. I made out a plan for a week of meals including what supplies were needed to make those meals. The plan did not even make it through the first day before everything had to be changed. This was frustrating at first, but on reflection, I realize that I could just adjust a few things and change days and part of the plan could still work. Plans rarely work as originally conceived, but even a failed plan can often still be beneficial. Often at least part of the plan can still be useful. A plan does not have to be perfect to be beneficial. This does not please the perfectionist in all of us who want it all to work out perfectly. There is the danger that our quest for the best may miss out on the good. What is certain is that no plan makes it difficult to evaluate success or failure. Most often it leads to failure by neglect. So I have decided to keep on planning. Some plans may work out better than expected and at least I have the reassurance that I am making the effort to do things well and in a timely manner. I can think of many things in the Bible to indicate that God has a plan and plans. God even at times seems to have encouraged preplanning by his people. The real challenge is to match my plans to God’s plans rather than trying to make God’s plans fit in with mine.
05/23/2021
Recently I noticed several books on how to use “To do” lists. It was a surprise to realize that someone might need instruction on something as straight forward as a “to do” list. However, I think I understand. When I make up a list, I often end up with thirty things on the list. Such a list can be so intimidating that rather than being motivated to get to work, I am motivated to take a nap. Lists of things to do can be helpful, but we may also need a “what not to do List.” I my case I might begin with “Don’t make too long a list.” Often knowing what not to do can be more important than knowing what to do. What has priority in our lists is a significant issue. The trivial can easily eclipse the vital. The Bible has significant lists. The fruit of the Spirit is one such list. Other lists indicate what not to do. The Ten Commandments has a mix of actions and prohibitions. We are to honor our Father and Mother and observe the Sabbath. We are not to steal or kill. Jesus indicated that we are to love each other and even love our enemies. We are to turn from evil and reject hatred. These are much more comprehensive than lists to mow the grass and rake the leaves, but they are important for everyday life. Maybe we ought to make out “to do” lists for these larger issues as well. It could be useful to make out an everyday list to be more kind, to be more loving, to forgive more easily, to practice peace, to be more polite and to be more like Jesus. Sometimes I need the daily reminders to stay on the right path.
05/16/2021
I have always enjoyed going out to eat at cafes and restaurants. Among the small irritations of the last year and a half, has been the lack of safe “eating out” options. Before I discovered my gluten allergy problems, when I went to a new restaurant I liked to order a dish I had never had before. My allergy changed all that. So many things have gluten in them (wheat, barley, rye, oats) that the choices were often limited. When I found an entre that worked, it often became my easy choice. Now days there are more choices than there were earlier so you do not have to feel at all sorry for me, but I do miss the adventure of choosing something totally new off the café menu. Recently a brand of potato chip that is gluten free introduced a new flavor, Truffle and Sea Salt. Naturally I had to try it. It was ok, but it will not replace the barbeque chips that I like. We need a bit of each experience in life. A new adventure, even a small one like a new flavor for a familiar food can really be fun. At other times the certainty of the familiar is what really feels good. I like that mix in worship as well. A new song with meaningful lyrics can spark my sense of God’s presence, but at times it is the familiar hymn or gospel song that helps me recognize the presence of God. Either way can keep me open on the God-ward side. Give me that old time religion and also let me sing a new song in praise to God. The best of the new will over time become the comforting old song I love. It is the best of both worlds.
05/09/2021
May is a beautiful month. The trees are in leaf. The flowers are blooming. Spring has fully come into own and summer is on the way. The month opens with May Day which celebrates workers around the world and closes with Memorial Day which celebrates those who have died. In between Mother’s Day is observed. This year it is May 9. There are other smaller observances but no major holidays. Perhaps May could be celebrated not for so many grand occasions but just for the everyday joys of an ordinary month. My wife’s mother had a simple hand lettered card pinned up in her kitchen which read “Ordinary day, help me recognize what a treasure you are.” It is a good thought for us as Christians which is picked up by Christians songs like Day by Day or Moment by Moment. God’s presence is with us in every day, in every moment. As he is with us in the great crises of our lives; He is there in the triumphal moments of our lives, but He is also there quietly in the ordinary gentle moments of life. I find great comfort in that realization. It is the ordinary part of family life that I most treasure. It is there where I am happiest. Certainly I enjoy the “great moments” and I am thankful for my family in the crisis times. Real joy comes to me in the everyday moments. The morning greeting, the good night kiss, the shared meals, the familiar jokes, the linked emotions, the hugs, the conversations, these small things of life are where life is really lived it seems to me. In these moments we are fully there and God is there as well. Family life is not the only place that the beauty of the ordinary is experienced, but it is one of those places. In some church traditions the time between Jan. 6 and Lent and the time between Ascension and Advent is called Ordinary Time while this is based on the numbers (ordinals), it is 33 or 34 Sundays out of the year. I like to think it also acknowledges the value of the ordinary in Christian experience.
05/02/2021
A number 2 pencil is really a very simple tool. It only needs to be sharpened to be immediately useful. Originally the term pencil referred to a small brush used for writing. Graphite filled pencils were a later innovation and still later mechanical pencils came on the scene. The mechanical pencil was a bit more complicated than the original paint brush, but still relatively simple. The use of computers to write was a great complicated leap forward for writing. Computers are enormously complicated. When the bead on your pencil breaks you just sharpen it again. In contrast few of us have the skill to fix a broken computer. When they work, they are wonderful. When they don’t it feels like a disaster. No one has to worry about someone hacking their pencil. There are no pass words to guard or to remember with a pencil. Pencils are very inexpensive while computers challenge our budget. The soft ware for a pencil we carry in our heads. Computer soft wear is a continuing expense. Personally I like working with a computer but sometimes simpler is best. I have found this to be true in other areas of like. A simple wedding is often more beautiful and more meaningful than an ornate excessive one. A short simple funeral service may be more comforting for mourners than a drawn out pageantry. An unaccompanied voice can often really “sell the song.” There is a place for the ornate, the complex, the intricate accompaniment, the grand pageant. Fortunately, we can legitimately have both the simple and the complex in our lives. Each has its place, but it is easy to be caught up in our complex world and miss the usefulness and beauty of the simple. To quote an ideal from the Shaker tradition “It’s a gift to be simple, it’s a gift to be free.”
04/25/2021
“Will we ever get back to normal in our country?” is a chant I hear from many. I feel that same anxiety as many of you do. I am pleased that there are small marks of more normal function slowly developing. We now have effective vaccines for COVID-19 and growing numbers who have been inoculated. Perhaps we may never get back to “normal.” Hopefully, we have learned some lessons from the pandemic which can help us in the future. I have tried to think about what I have learned. I now have a greater appreciation for things I have missed. Things like worshipping together in person, traveling to see family, and meeting friends at a restaurant are among those. I now am more consistent in hand washing. I am alert to how I affect the lives of people around me. Next flu season even if COVID 19 is not present, I may wear a mask at times to protect myself and others from the flu in addition to getting my flu shot. I have learned again how much human beings need another’s human touch. We have learned that we can survive and adapt under difficult circumstances. Perhaps it would be unfortunate if everything returned to “normal,” if we didn’t learn anything from this difficult time. Let’s bring back the best and change the worst and find a new normal. Whatever the future brings, when we get there, we will discover that God is already there ahead of us.
04/18/2021
Thursday, April 22, is Earth Day. The first Earth Day in the United States was in 1970. It is observed in over 190 countries and mobilizes 1 Billion people for action every Earth Day. The environmental concerns had been prompted in part by the publication of Rachel Carson’s Silent Spring in 1962. Gaylord Nelson, a junior senator from Wisconsin, and Pete Mc Closkey, a conservative minded Republican Representative recruited Denis Hayes an environmental activist to organize campus teaching for college students on the environment. The idea broadened to include many different organizations and faith groups. It was subsequently name Earth Day. It led ultimately to the formation of the United States Environmental Protection Agency of the Federal Government and many other Acts of Congress for the good of the environment. In 1990 Earth Day went international with 141 countries considering environmental issues. Earth Day now is widely recognized as the largest secular observance in the world. As we continue to face climate issues, pollution, and environmental disasters, Earth Day provides resources of information and action to support our magnificent world. As Christians, Earth Day is a good reminder of the responsibility we have to preserve and enhance the beautiful earth the Creator has provided as our home. Earth Day would be a good day to do all we can to clean, preserve, and heal the world around us. We could start small in our own small circles and join others in celebrating and participating in Earth Day. After all “This is our Father’s World”. Let’s take care of it.
04/11/2021
Easter Sunday, the sermon centered on the resurrection account of the meeting between Mary Magdalene and Jesus outside the tomb. Mary was the first witness to the resurrection. Jesus appeared to Mary who at first did not recognize him until he spoke her name. The account is full of beauty and surprise, but it is easy to miss one of the other significant elements in the account. In the world of Jesus’ time women were often seen as unreliable witnesses, perhaps because they were viewed as more emotional than men. That the resurrected Jesus chose women as the first witnesses to his resurrection with Mary as the very first witness shows a different view. The male disciples were initially inclined to discount the women’s experience until Jesus also appears to Simon Peter.How like Jesus to upset the expectations of the world and even his disciples.It was not what they expected, but then Jesus often exceeds expectations.The recognition of these women as central disciples is wonderfully remarkable for that time and still remarkable for so many in our time.There is evidence that women play a significant role in the leadership of the early church with women serving as deacon/ministers as well as prophets in those early years.The later church backed away from the role of women in leadership so that today women in ministry seems to many as a new thing.It really is a very old thing that the church as a whole forgot and that which we have again discovered.The resurrection accounts tell us many important things.Among those things is the confidence that God has in the work and witness of women of faith.Jesus is risen and in him all of us rise.
04/04/2021
One of my favorite hymns of Easter is Christ Arose. The text reads: “ Low in the grave he lay- Jesus my Savior! Waiting the coming day – Jesus my Lord. Up from the grave he arose with a mighty triumph o’er his foes. He arose a victor from the dark domain, and he lives forever with his saints to reign. He arose! He arose! Hallelujah! Christ arose!” I particularly like the way the verse begins to slow and soften with a meditative tone and then the chorus rises up with a shout, a change of pace, and an ascending melody. I’m not sure that makes it a great musical composition, but it is so much fun to sing. It is a rousing celebrative song of Christian witness. We would do well to sing more of the Easter hymns through the whole Christian year. I know that since Joy the the World has become attached to Christmas, I always plan to sing it in the middle of the summer. Perhaps Christ Arose or Christ the Lord is Risen Today ought to be sung during the middle of winter. It might help us remember the centrality of Jesus’ resurrection. In a way every Sunday is a mini-Easter in recognition of the day of Jesus’ resurrection. We could even start many services with the call and response: The Lord is risen, He is risen indeed. It is the joyous claim of the Christian church through the centuries, across many languages, and cultures. It is the gift of God to all humanity, to whoever will consider it. Because he lives we too shall live with abundant life now and in the eternal life now and forever.
03/28/2021
The triumphal joy of Palm Sunday is in sharp contrast to the despair at Good Friday. Is this celebration by Jesus’ disciples inappropriate for the seriousness of Holy Week; or is it a kind of whistling in the dark? How do we reconcile these two observances, Palm Sunday and Good Friday? Perhaps the joy of Palm Sunday is in anticipation of the glory of Easter even though the disciples were right about Jesus' final triumph even if they did not anticipate the troubled week ahead. So we now sing Sunday hymns about the coming glory of heaven even when we do not plan on leaving on the following Monday. We live in anticipation of that final exaltation when it arrives. The truth of the matter is that we need both joyous celebration and solemn contemplation. One without the other leaves us seriously out of balance. In our relationship with each other, scripture enjoins us to weep with those who weep and rejoice with those who rejoice. So whether you literally wave your palm branches on Sunday or metaphorically wave them in your mind, go ahead and rejoice. You deserve it and we enjoy celebrating with it. I imagine even the Heavenly Father smiles as we celebrate God’s triumph through God’s son, Jesus Christ. Ride on King Jesus. We will spread our coats before your path and wave our branches in your honor. You are our king and it is a joy to celebrate arrival.
03/21/2021
Passion Sunday and Palm Sunday are both on the Sunday before Easter. This always creates a conflict in my mind both emphases are important but it is hard to do both in the same service. So I like to move Passion Sunday to two Sundays before Easter. This allows us to give the suffering sacrifice of Jesus its full observance and lets us celebrate Jesus’ triumphal entry into Jerusalem its full joyous response. Since in the Church of the Brethren tradition we recognize the traditional church calendar, but are not bound by it, we feel free to make such changes when they are suitable. The church’s hymnody is rich in songs about the cross and the suffering of Jesus. Those songs touch a deep place in many of our hearts. Some can reduce us to empathetic tears while others provoke in us a profound sense of gratitude for Jesus’ sacrifice for all of us. Sacrifice is at the heart of the gospel. The example of Jesus calls us all to a life of sacrifice for others. This is not because we have low self- worth. Just the opposite is the case. Because we know how God sees us as worthy, we know that our sacrifice is the gift of something enormously valuable. Jesus bore his own cross and bids us take up our own crosses and follow him. There will be joy in our sacrifice but there will also be sorrow. A perfect hymn for Passion Sunday reads: “Man of Sorrows” what a name for the Son of God who came ruined sinners to reclaim! Hallelujah, what a Savior!” We follow Jesus into the suffering at the cross in the anticipation of the resurrection. Hallelujah, What a Savior!
03/14/2021
I keep looking hard for blessings in the midst of the pandemic. It is not easy to find them. The grief at the loss of loved ones, the loneliness of separation, the increase in depression, the economic challenges, the limitations on activity, difficulties of travel, the fear of sickness and death, and the isolation from friends have taken a toll on all of us. Still there have been some small rays of sunshine peeking through. We have all realized how significant our family interactions are to us. We have found creative ways like online worship services and zoom meetings to do important things. For my wife and I, just going out to the grocery store has seemed almost like a date night. Some have even found new ways at expressing service and care for each other. Front line workers are fast becoming our new heroes. We have even a new appreciation for many of the things we have taken for granted. Even some thing as basic as toilet tissue has a new status in our minds. Many have rediscovered the joy of cooking and baking, while longing for the full return of restaurants. One small blessing has been staying at home more. Projects that have long been put off until later have been taken on now that we have more time at home. These minor blessings do not fully offset the rigors and pain of the pandemic, but they do remind me that I can still find blessings even in the most difficult of times. I’m not sure I have learned to be content whatever the circumstance… (Philippians 4:11), but I am working on it.
03/07/2021
In Sunday School last week, the teacher asked, “What is a moment of joy you experienced in some event in your life?” I have thought about that question over this last week. It was as hard to choose just one event or moment. Some of them were great events. I felt real joy when I got married. I felt great joy when I confessed Jesus as Savior and Lord and became a Christian. I felt joy at the birth of my daughters and the birth of my grandchildren. I felt joy at my ordination to the ministry. I felt joy in the brief moments of life and the feel of a mittened hand in mine, the sweetness of a good night kiss, the savor of a perfect meal, the thrill of a beautiful anthem, the thunderous roar of a great church organ, the contentment of time around the campfire, the beauty of sunrise over the mountains, the holy silence of worship, the quiet presence of a loved one in the same room, and the laughter at a shared table. I have even experienced joy in the most unusual moments. Joy has come to me during a funeral service at the memory of an encounter with the one who has passed away, and at the encouragement of those who I visited intending to encourage them. In great ways and in small ways joy can burst into our lives. Recently my wife and I had our second injection of the Moderna vaccine for Covid-19. Injections are no ones’ favorite thing, but as we left the site after the suggested fifteen minute wait time after the injection, I was struck by relief and then by joy as I realized after more than a year that we can now plan visits to our children and grandchildren safely. I know there is still more care needed ahead, but I found joy in knowing that we are on the way toward a better tomorrow. There is still joy in life and joy in the Lord.